Brain in the Image of God

It's happened so many times I wouldn't even dare to count. My wife has a much higher standard of tidyness and cleaning than I do, and so many times she has corrected or critiqued something that I've done around the house…and I flipped out.

Not externally. That's not the kind of person I am. You will very rarely see me yell or make a scene. But internally, my world would spin.

“Why can I never be good enough? Why is everything my fault?”

It's what we call a trigger. That word has become very popular and is often overused. When a trigger is negative, it brings us back to a time of trauma in our lives. Our body reacts as if that trauma is still happening, which is why it can feel like our world is out of control.

This happens to so many of us, perhaps all of us. It happened so much to me that it was affecting my marriage and other important relationships.

I began seeing a therapist several years ago. We've done a lot of work together, but one concept he gave to me has been especially helpful.

That concept is called the ‘noticing brain.’

Normally when I have been triggered in the past, I have used my left brain faculties to try and move forward. This is the part of the brain which we typically use to gain insight and solve problems. When a trigger happened, I would frequently try to analyze where it was coming from, what caused it, and what I needed to do to resolve it.

Of course, insight into our trauma can be helpful. It can be extremely beneficial to be able to name what the trauma was, why it happened, and why it impacted us the way it did.

However, when we are in the midst of a trigger--when the trauma is being re-lived--insight doesn't actually help much.

Why is that? Here's what I learned and what has helped me immensely. Trauma is stored in the amygdala, the part of our brain responsible for detecting threats and initiating survival instincts. Thus, when we are triggered, our amygdala is what is taking over. Here's the key to understand: the left brain functions I mentioned have no direct connection to the amygdala, so reasoning and insight have no effect on the trigger.

There is, however,  a part of the brain that does have a direct connection to the amygdala-the prefrontal cortex, or what many call the ‘noticing brain.’

What this means is that when we are triggered, it is not particularly helpful to analyze the situation. Even less helpful are judgment statements like, “I thought I had figured this out: I can't believe I'm going through this again.”

What is extremely helpful, however, are noticing thoughts of presence and curiosity. These are thoughts like,

“I wonder why I'm feeling this way.”

“I'm sensing that my emotions are on high alert.”

“My stomach is churning and my chest is tight. I'm going to sit with that.”

In hindsight, this makes so much sense. When we see a therapist or even talk to a compassionate friend, they don't help us by fixing the situation. In truth, such a task would be impossible in most cases. However, something in us begins to shift when the person listens and affirms what we are experiencing. No judgment. Not even a solution. Just presence.

It strikes me how much this reveals the image of God within our brains. We have the capacity for logic, reason, problem solving, and intuition. These are all beautiful things. What brings healing to the most wounded parts within us, however, is the part of our brain that is simply present.

The part that can be still.

The part that can be still and know that God is with us.

The part that can be still and know that God is within us.

No wonder believing in a God who is vengeful and judgmental doesn't bring the best out of people. Such thoughts only contribute to the impact of trauma in our lives. And when we live from such wounded parts, we tend to live in ways that baffle us. We do not know what we do in those instances.

Thankfully, Jesus has an offer for such a moment: forgiveness.

He has an antidote for our wounds: presence.

He has a promise for our moments of anxiety and fear: he will be in us, and we in him.

Perhaps the noticing brain is a key part of that. I think it is. It is helping to bring me back to the present moment where his love is always offered, where we are always included, and his peace is always available.

It is another instance of our true identity: Christ in us, the hope of glory.